In response to “The Undefeated’s” list of the “50 Greatest Black Athletes of all Time” that was released earlier this week, certain people had some choice words regarding the results. Stephen A. Smith for example, went on a tirade about the decision to include Tiger Woods on the list, due to “his lack of enthusiasm and recognition to his blackness”.
Whether you agree or disagree of it’s accuracy, I’ve decided upon myself to create additional Top 5 lists for the Greatest White, Hispanic, Asian & even Animal Athletes of all time. Hopefully this can spark a light-hearted debate, but will most likely ignite a cavalcade of aggressive arguments and slander.
Regardless, below I will begin with my Top 5 Greatest White Athletes, along with some Honorable mentions.
1. Michael Phelps
2 Tom Brady
3 Larry Bird
4 Diana Taurasi
5 Peyton Manning
Honorable Mention- Lance Armstrong- Joe Montana- Babe Ruth- Mia Hamm- Maria Sharapova- Ron Jeremy (yes I am considering porn a sport)
Admit it. Its a solid Top 5. Many can argue Mia Hamm over Diana Taurasi, but you can’t argue with the amount of championships Diana has won at every level. Babe Ruth gets the nod for having a beer gut and eating 6 hot dogs before every game, while still being the greatest hitters of all time (which is very white of him). I left Derek Jeter off the list as many may consider him more black then white. Some may say Joe Montana should be ahead of Peyton. To those people I say- have you seen Peyton at the ESPY’s and in those Papa John’s commercials? Michael Phelps gets the nod over Tom Brady at number 1 for being the greatest white Olympian, in a predominately white sport.
Now onto the Top 5 Greatest Hispanic athletes of all time.
1 Lionel Messi
3 Rafael Nadal
4 Ted Williams
5 Manu Ginobli
Honorable Mention- Christiano Rinaldo- David Ortiz- Sammy Sosa- Pele- Miguel Cabrera- Alex Rodriguez
As a basketball guy, I needed to show some love to Manu at number 5. Christiano Rinaldo is also arguably the most beautiful man of all time, and for that he gets in. Nobody knows that Ted Williams is Hispanic. That alone, on top of his Hall of Fame career with the Sox and Dodgers gets him Top 5. Neymar makes more money then the top 15 NBA players combined. Add that too the fact that he goes by first name basis like Madonna, and you got my number 2. Let me know if there is a more famous and more talented Hispanic athlete then Lionel Messi? I’m open to suggestions.
Now onto the Top 5 Greatest Asian Athletes of all time.
1 Manny Pacquiao
2 Yao Ming
3 Tiger Woods
4 Ichiro Suzuki
5 Jeremy Lin
Honorable Mention- Michelle Kwan- Takeru Kobayashi- BJ Penn- Mulan
The New York Knicks have not been exciting since Linsanity! Thats my reasoning for Jeremy Lin at number 5 over Michelle Kwan. Jeremy is also a Harvard grad (how very Asian of him). Tiger Woods gets number 3, since he was blacklisted from the actual black list thanks to Stephen A. Ichiro is the most iconic Asian Baseball player, in my opinion. Yao Ming is the most iconic basketball player, and Manny Pacquiao was part of the biggest money grab sporting event maybe in American history. Takeru Kobayashi is the greatest competitive eater, famous for his wins at The Nathan’s Hot Dog eating contest. Disney’s Mulan gets the nod in Honorable Mention due to her top 10 play of all time, when she famously shot a dragon cannon into a mountain. As we know, this caused a huge avalanche leading to the demise of the entire Hun Army.
Lastly, we cannot forget some of our favorite 4 legged friends! Here is my Top 5 Greatest Animal Athletes of all time.
1. Seabiscuit & Secretariat
2 Air Bud
3 Skate Boarding Pug
4 Man O War
5 Jonathon the Tortoise
Honorable Mention- Any dog ever in the Puppy Bowl
Jonathon the Tortoise is the worlds oldest turtle at 179 years young. That requires a level of stamina and resilience that we cannot leave unseen. Secretariat is the fastest horse of all time, and Seabiscuit is the most famous and most undersized horse ever to win. These two in my opinion should share the number 1 spot. People don’t realize how hard it is for humans to skateboard, never mind dogs. Add that Pugs have breathing issues due to their pushed in nose, and you have a true “Underdog”. Lastly, for anyone that has ever seen the level of cuteness put on display at the puppy bowl, please give me a good reason to not let them in?
So there you have it. Take all picks with a grain of salt, and shout me out if there’s any you think deserve to be on the list!
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